feuervogel | Wangst and weemo

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I read a lot of writers' blogs. Or LJs, whatever. And I've started to feel like I'm inadequate and inept as a writer, because I wasn't an English major. I'm not Trained in things like Narrative Technique, Structure, and Symbolism, and I'm not well-read enough in classics, folklore, or myths to make use of Allusions.

I'm an impostor.

All I've got is some characters, a story idea, and 20-odd years of reading spec fic (and some Real Books™). No technique, no ideas for creative symbolism or structure or literary allusions.

I'm never gonna sell anything.

Current Mood: weemo

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Oh, god, I forgot, until a news story tonight about the new book...

The ultimate argument. The final proof you don't need writing skill. You don't need research. You don't need realism. You don't have to write compelling dialogue or narrative. You don't even need interesting, realistic characters or consistency in characterization.

I give you...

Dan. Motherfucking. Brown.

Quod Erat Demonstrandum.

Ahahah! Is that the guy who wrote The Da Vinci Code? (Which I have not, nor will I ever, read.)

Q.E.D., indeed!

It is, and, sad to say, I have read the book. So I can say with all reasonable assurance that he would fail any writing course in the world. Not to mention any history course.

And then this lovely link (http://ow.ly/pGV9) crossed my path. XD

Wow. Picking the 20 worst sentences of Dan Brown is like trying to find a needle in a needlestack.

So, now, take that, and multiply it by hundreds of pages over multiple novels. Because, trust me, The Da Vinci Code doesn't really have any better turns of phrase that I recall.

But the chapters are short, and the sentences are usually simple, and you get to thrill to the fact that you're way smarter than the Professor of Symbology and all his very educated friends. I mean, like, people who studied Leonardo da Vinci's life, but are thwarted by a clever "code" for several pages - said "code" being mirror-writing. You know, like Leonardo used all his life.