Am I being weird about this?

[feuervogel]

My sister is pregnant. I want to crochet her (baby) a blanket.

I emailed my mom to ask if that's something she'd like, and mom replies that I should email sis a picture of the pattern and let her decide if she wants it and pick a color.

Isn't that the opposite of a gift? I'd planned to go to the store and pick out a pattern from a book and some yarn, or get yarn that has a pattern on the label. I want to make something very neutral gendered: no pink or blue, no patterns (hearts or flowers). I saw a book of afghan crochet (the kind of crochet that's like single-hook knitting) baby blankets, and I liked one of the patterns in it.

Honestly, now I don't even want to bother.

Anyway, internets, am I wrong for being upset that I should let a gift be dictated?

Comments

[chalgaryn.livejournal.com]

At most I would be tempted to say something vague like, "Hey, I was thinking about making something for the baby. Are there any particular colors you would prefer (or actively dislike)?" Since you already know the colors she's looking at, it really doesn't seem necessary to get any more input than that. And don't feel limited by those colors, just keep them in mind when choosing colors to try to pick something that won't clash horribly with her color palette.

[beth_leonard]

When I was pregnant with Peter we received no less than 7 hand-made baby blankets. When Amber was born we received another 3. I treasured all of them because they were made by people I cared about who cared about me, many of whom knew me from when I was little (women in my mother's Bible study group made several.)

Most of the other store-bought stuff people gave me from when the kids were babies has been passed on, but I still have the hand-made blankets because I'm sentimental like that. No one asked me about colors or anything, and they ranged from light-forest green, to silky white, to google-colored.

The thing about having a lot of baby blankets is that (at least in this area) people tend to stash them in the diaper bag, and then when you go somewhere, you spread the blanket out on the floor before setting your baby down on places people have been walking. You wash them and rotate through them, so plan for using something that is washable. The larger blankets are good for when the child is a little older (18 m) and wants to sleep with something, because the infant-sized ones are too small for that.

With your family, I get the feeling people could manage to not appreciate something whether it was made-to-order or not, so I'd say "do it" if you would enjoy doing it and feel love toward your sister and her baby while making it, and "don't do it" if you'd feel resentment during the process.

--Beth